Special occasions and family gathers are some of the most memorable and happy times in life. But, for some people Thanksgiving and Christmas are a time of immense stress and sadness. With money in short supply, scattered families, or the loss of a loved one, special times only enhance the absence of the feelings that should accompany festive events. For many, mental health and the holidays are like oil and water. The two do not mix well.
Sadly, the holidays often see a rise in the number of suicides. A time reserved for peace and joy facilitates overwhelming depression in many people that feel like they are on the outside looking in, to an unrealistic life. Hope ebbs, depression increases, and whatever is wrong with the world is only pronounced. The three main sources challenging mental health during the holidays are:
- Relationships
- Physical demands
So, it is extremely important to learn some coping skills. Instead of letting depression rule the day, learn how to stay mentally healthy during Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years, even if the world is not perfect, and it seems like there is nothing to celebrate.
4 Ways to Cope with the Holidays
Just because the calendar says it is time to be joyful and peaceful does not make it so. While many people are celebrating, spending money like water, and exercising good cheer, there are probably equal amounts of individuals wondering how to put food on the table, missing loved ones, and wishing all of the festivities would simply go away. For these people, here are four ideas to help make it through the holidays.
Go Ahead
People lose loved ones, live far away from friends and family; have recently gone through a divorce, or simply have no place to go, during the holidays. Thus, these special occasions are also a time of increased sadness. Go ahead. Acknowledge those feelings, and have a good cry, if it will help release those emotions. An individual spending the first Christmas in 50 years without a spouse, cannot be expected to find joy in the holiday. People need to give themselves permission to mourn.
Find People and Purpose
After accepting sad and lonely feelings, it is time to change circumstances. Rather than spending the holidays sad and alone, seek out family and friends. Do not become isolated. If friends and family are not available, make an effort to find purpose for the holidays. For example, volunteer at a shelter or read to children in the hospital. Help those individuals that are even less fortunate. Oftentimes, helping others takes the emphasis off of personal problems. In some cases, life does not seem so bad, when others are facing more serious struggles.
Accept Change
Family traditions are great. But, when life happens and those normal holiday activities cannot be observed, it is devastating for many people. Maybe the kids have moved far away, and the money to return home is simply not available. Then, it is time to cherish the old traditions and establish new ones for this year.
Call friends and family. Share cards and emails. Send emails. Then, come up with another activity to bring some joy to the holidays. For instance, a churchgoer may know of other families that will not be able to go home for the holidays. Invite these families to come over for a potluck. Plan a time of games. No one has to be alone for the holidays.
Money Matters
Many people simply do not have the money to celebrate the holidays. Job losses or cutbacks, the increasing cost of living, unexpected bills, and more, contribute to a really tight budget. Be realistic. Do not dive further into debt, simply to get junior exactly what he wants for Christmas.
Especially when it comes to kids, understand that they are pretty smart. They know when the budget is tight, even if a word on the subject is never spoken. When it comes time to buy Christmas presents, stick to an affordable budget. Some families choose to make their own gifts for one another. Others trade cards with gifts of service like doing the dishes out of turn, a free night of babysitting-so Mom and Dad can go out, coupons for hugs, or whatever. The holidays do not have to be the latest toy. Do not let money matters destroy the chance to simply be together.
In short, the holidays are not full of peace and joy for a lot of people. The calendar only adds stress and sorrow to people that lost loved ones, do not have the money to celebrate as usual, or are lonely. Instead of letting the events lead to deep depression, acknowledge the circumstances and gain some coping skills. In part one, four ways of dealing with the holidays have been discussed. In part 2, learn more skills to cope with the holiday season.